Meet Henry in Accounting. That is the name of the spiky cactus you see on the left. He is dangerous and doesn’t have to try. He is an office hazard.
Yes, yes, I know all you folks out there don’t name your plants. But, I decided I would after hearing all the names that B gives his plants. Good God, I’m keeping up with the B’s on naming plants! (side note: the B’s refer to my bro and his partner)
I have a TV on top of a long wide filing cabinet. Now, thanks to shows like the office and to those sick office hazard movies they show you once every whenever to keep “everyone aware of safety!” we all know that opening two drawers of a two drawer filing cabinet is truly dangerous. I knew that. Heck, Henry in Accounting knew that.
But, did I stop to consider that the TV was perched near the front? Did I consider that Henry in Accounting would win any duel we entered? Did I consider the fact that the TV was perched on the front of the cabinet AND that Henry in Accounting was on TOP of the TV? Nope. All I wanted to do was get some silly little paper. Hm. Somehow, his spikes really weren’t worth it.
So, as I’m realizing the whole kit and caboodle (yes, Virginia, there was more stuff on that cabinet) is just about to topple over on me, I decided it’s wise to push the TV back in place with my head. “Use your head, girl!” That’s what my pops told me, so that’s what I did. And wonder of wonders, Henry in Accounting lost his balance. Of course, he gracefully landed on my head and then took a swan dive for the floor. But, he’s a cactus and “heavens be David” he turned out fine. Not a scratch. Seriously, I took that photo today and this incident happened nearly 2 days ago.
Here it was Monday morning I hadn’t even left for work and I’d already wrastled with a cactus! Let me tell you – my head hurt all day. I mean I was totally discombobulated ! So, Henry’s spikes are a bit beefy and they were a might painful. Tonight I was able to remove a spike from my head that was 1 cm long. And, there are several more in my head along with ones in my hands.
And still, Henry in Accounting stands – proud, tall, and menacingly spiky. Ooo I should threaten to turn him in for the weekly safety report. “… And Monday morning and employee had complete disregard for her safety training. She placed a cactus on top of a TV on top of a filing cabinet. Then she attempted to the only two drawers of the cabinet at the same time. The employee and the cactus have been placed on temporary leave until the situation can be completely sorted out.”